


if the sun is shining, stand in it

by starrydrowse



Series: DL bingo 2020 [1]
Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: ??????????, F/F, Fluff, Genderswap, Kidfic, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Pregnancy, actually no kids really get hurt at all three year olds are just dramatic lol, also kids. lesbians being moms. we love to see it, fem!breaky, i am back after three months with even more lesbians for you, i'm not really sure what else to tag this tbh, just some wholesome soft fem!breaky tbh, maybe uhhhhh, no children get seriously hurt don't worry, they comfort their kids for dumb reasons. like it's not a big deal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:40:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26118928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrydrowse/pseuds/starrydrowse
Summary: For what feels like the millionth time, Brianna finds herself feeling incredibly grateful for the little life she’s built here with Johanna out in the countryside.
Relationships: John Deacon/Brian May
Series: DL bingo 2020 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1896499
Comments: 4
Kudos: 12
Collections: Dork Lovers Server Challenges





	if the sun is shining, stand in it

**Author's Note:**

> hello party people !! i am back with more lesbians to offer you :)
> 
> just a little drabble, written for the prompt 'elbow kisses.' i should have something longer coming for you very very soon, as well as more drabbles !! enjoy <3
> 
> title is taken from a quote by jeanette winterson, from her book "why be happy when you could just be normal?"

It’s one of the first warm days of spring. The air is fresh and bright, and as Brianna sits outside and soaks in the pale sunshine, she takes deep breaths that fill her lungs and lets the fresh spring air breathe new life back into her after the cold, long winter.

The kids are all out playing, taking advantage of the fact that the last of the snow has melted and the grass is finally dry. Michael and Jimmy are down at the far end of the garden playing spies, half hidden by the tree-line that marks the end of their property, while Robbie has long since abandoned the game in favour of swinging. Brianna watches him go higher and higher on the old swing-set, and she makes a mental note to thank Johanna’s sister again for selling it to them secondhand. Nearby, Laura is kneeling on the grass beside her plastic children’s slide, talking away to the collection of stuffed animals she’d brought outside with her.

Brianna turns her attention to her wife, then, who’s over by the fence tending to the vegetable garden. Johanna is up to her elbows in dirt, having spent the last hour weeding and putting down some fresh soil, and Brianna can’t help but appreciate how unfairly good she looks like that; on her knees in her dirty overalls with her short hair a mess. 

Usually, between the two of them, Brianna is more the gardener when it comes down to it. Johanna is much more inclined towards the handiwork; she’s the one who built the deck in their backyard (with Brianna’s “help,” of course), she assembled the swing-set for the kids, and she’s always the one to fix things when they break around the house, putting them back together. But unfortunately, being eight months pregnant has made it rather difficult for Brianna to keep up with the gardening herself, so thankfully Johanna has stepped in to pick up her slack. Brianna rubs her tummy absentmindedly as she watches her wife’s strong arms flexing as she pulls out another handful of weeds.

“Mummy! Mummy!” Robbie shouts out to Johanna thens. “Look how high I can swing!”

Johanna turns her head to look up at him, squinting in the sun. “Very cool!” she grins. “Be careful though Robbie, not too high remember?”

Robbie ignores her. “Mama!” he calls out to Brianna instead, and Brianna’s head snaps up. “Mama watch this, I’m gonna jump!”

Brianna’s heart stutters for a moment, and she feels a surge of fear that only a parent who just heard their eight year old shout those words can feel.

“Robbie no, that’s dangerous darling!” she tries, but before she can even get the words out, Robbie is swinging up, up, up again, before throwing himself off the swing at the highest point. 

He soars in the air for half a second, before landing unsteadily on his feet with a loud ‘OOF,’ thankfully unharmed. He’s grinning toothily from ear to ear when he spins around to face Brianna. “Did you see it Mama?” he asks excitedly, though his smile quickly falters when he sees her frown.

Brianna gives him an unimpressed look, and then beckons him to come closer. Robbie walks towards her seemingly as slowly as he possibly can, dragging his feet, until he’s standing directly in front of her.

“Robert.” Brianna keeps her voice calm and level. “What did we tell you about jumping off the swings?” 

Robbie can tell he’s getting chewed out; his mums hardly ever call him ‘Robert,’ only when he’s in trouble. He stares back Brianna with his mouth hanging open, like he’s surprised about it; as if he doesn’t remember that both his mums haven’t been telling him not to jump off the swings since the first day them they’d set them up. Robbie starts playing with the bottom of his shirt guiltily, looking across the garden over at his other mum, to see if she’ll come to his aid. Johanna shakes her head.

“Answer your Mama Robbie,” she says sternly, and Robbie turns back to Brianna, who looks at him expectantly.

He shrugs.

Brianna resists the urge to sigh. “Do you not remember?”

Robbie shakes his head.

“We told you not to jump off the swings.”

“Oh.”

Brianna nods. “Please don’t do that darling. I don’t want to tell you again.”

Robbie frowns, looking down to watch his own hands twisting in the fabric of his shirt. Brianna reaches out to take his tiny hands in hers, mostly so he won’t stretch out his top. “I just wanted to show you how high I can jump,” he mumbles finally.

Brianna smiles gently, squeezing his hands. “I know, love. And it’s very cool! But it makes your mummy and I very worried, alright? You could fall and really hurt yourself, Robbie.”

“But I won’t,” Robbie pouts.

“But you could, though,” Brianna explains. “Don’t forget your brothers and your sister all look up to you, too. You’re the oldest, Robbie, you need to set a good example for them. If they decide to copy you, _they_ could get hurt, because they’re still little.”

By this point, Johanna has wandered over to join the conversation, wiping her dirt-covered hands on her overalls as she walks.

“Please listen to your Mama, Robbie,” Johanna says. “We just don’t want any of you to get hurt, okay darling?”

After a few moments, Robbie nods, reluctantly.

Brianna glances up at her wife, who looks about as unconvinced as she feels. She frowns. “Robbie,” she says quietly, “I want you to promise me that you won’t do it again, please.”

Robbie sighs. “I promise,” he grumbles. Brianna still isn’t quite satisfied, but she figures it’s the best she’s going to get at the moment. Maybe they’ll have another talk with him about it later.

“Thank you,” she smiles, squeezing his hands before letting them go. “Now go on and keep playing.”

Robbie’s face lights up. “Can I keep swinging?”

Brianna stumbles for a beat. She supposes they probably shouldn’t let him keep swinging, at least for now— he did break the rules. She glances up at Johanna, who thankfully jumps in to help.

“Why don’t you go join your brothers instead?” she suggests gently. “You can use the swings again a little later on.”

Thankfully, Robbie doesn’t fight it. 

“M’kay,” is all he says, before he turns on his heel and runs towards the trees at the end of the backyard.

Johanna takes a step closer to Brianna as they both watch Robbie plaster himself against the trunk of a tall oak tree to avoid being seen by Jimmy, who is doing a series of what he considers to be tuck-and-rolls through the grass as he tries to sneak up on Michael. Brianna smiles to herself, before she glances over to check on Laura. She’s still kneeling on the grass beside her slide, talking to her audience of stuffed animals, apparently taking turns with each of them going down the side. As Brianna watches, Laura selects Mrs. Goose from the arranged crowd of plush onlookers, giving her a quick pat on the head before she climbs the two short steps to the top of the slide and then takes a seat.

“Ready?” Laura asks Mrs. Goose, before moving the toy’s neck to make it look like she’s nodding. “Hold on tight then!” Laura cries, squeezing Mrs. Goose tight to her chest before sending them both down the slide, giggling. Shrieks of laughter are coming from the boys now, too, as they chase one another around the yard, and for what feels like the millionth time, Brianna finds herself feeling incredibly grateful for the little life she’s built here with Johanna out in the countryside.

Johanna sighs softly from above her, her warm hand settling on Brianna’s shoulder. Brianna glances up to see her smiling to herself as she watches the kids play, and she brings a hand up to squeeze Johanna’s hand in hers. Quickly though, she wrinkles her nose and takes her hand away.

“You’ve got dirt on your hand,” Brianna tells her.

Johanna shrugs. “Just a little.”

Brianna carefully removes Johanna’s hand from her shoulder. “I love you, but please don’t get soil on my shirt.”

Johanna wipes her hands on her overalls again. “Better?”

Brianna looks at her skeptically. 

Then Johanna grins, before reaching out to run her dirty finger across Brianna’s cheek. Brianna gasps, before her face breaks out into an incredulous smile.

“How very dare you!” she laughs, watching Johanna’s shoulders shake as she laughs along. Brianna’s shakes her head. “Shame on you Johanna Deacon. Torturing your poor wife when she’s too bloody pregnant to fight back.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Johanna giggles, shaking her head and pushing her fringe out of her eyes. “How is she anyway?” she asks, nodding to Brianna’s belly.

“Restless,” Brianna admits, settling a hand over her bump, where the baby has been doing cartwheels for the past hour.

“She’s just eager to get out here and join in on all the fun,” Johanna jokes.

“Well I wish she’d hurry up and do it then,” Brianna laughs. 

She’d figured that being pregnant would get easier over time; this is their fifth baby after all, and her second time carrying. Johanna had carried the first two times, but after the twins were born, she’d quickly decided that she was done with the whole pregnancy thing. Brianna can’t say she blames her; being pregnant is hard work. She’s exhausted all the time, her back hurts, her ankles are swollen, and she feels ill almost constantly. It’s maybe a little easier than the first time around, because at least this time she knew what to expect. But being _this pregnant_ — eight whole months— will always just be terribly uncomfortable, she supposes.

Johanna looks down at her then, and there’s something so gentle in her eyes when she asks, “Are you alright?”

Now there’s something that Brianna _loves_ about being pregnant. Johanna is always gentle with her, always kind and caring and fiercely protective, but when Brianna is pregnant, she somehow becomes even more so, and there’s something about it that just makes Brianna feel so wonderfully warm inside.

She nods, sighing softly and leaning over into her wife, resting her head against Johanna’s hip as she watches the boys play.

“You sure? How do you feel?”

“I feel like I’m eight and a half months pregnant, Jo,” Brianna jokes, but when Johanna doesn’t say anything, Brianna squeezes her wrist gently. “I’m alright love,” Brianna reassures her. “I feel fine.”

“Good,” Johanna hums, bending down to kiss the top of her head.

Brianna preens, smiling as she tips her head up for a proper kiss, which Johanna gives her easily.

“Mama! Mummy!” Laura calls out suddenly. “Watch me watch me!”

She’s standing on the top of her slide, bouncing excitedly on the balls of her feet. The moment they both look, before either of them can say anything, Laura stretches out her little arms and jumps off, Mrs. Goose in hand.

It’s only a small slide; it’s barely two feet tall and made of plastic, and underneath it there’s only grass. There’s nothing about it that’s terribly dangerous. 

However, Laura is barely three, and as such, she doesn’t exactly have the best balance. Which means that the moment she lands on her feet, she immediately stumbles and topples over, falling on her elbows onto the grass.

She’s quiet for a long moment, and Brianna and Johanna both exchange a look, knowing exactly what’s about to happen. A few seconds, there’s a loud, muffled wail as Laura begins to cry. She pushes herself up with her hands and runs towards them, her red little face scrunched up as she nearly trips over herself again in an attempt to get to her mums.

“Oh, darling,” Brianna coos, at the same time that Johanna crouches down and spreads her arms to allow Laura to run into her. Laura clings to her chest, balling up the fabric of Johanna’s overalls in tiny fists as he cries.

“Oh, hey, you’re okay sweetheart,” Johanna murmurs, gently rubbing her back.

“I-I-I h-hurted my a-arm,” Laura hiccups.

“I know, I saw,” Johanna says gently. Can you show me where it hurts?”

Laura pulls away and shows Johanna both of her elbows, blinking up at her tearfully. Johanna nods solemnly, looking at where the skin there is slightly reddened by the impact with the ground.

It’s barely anything, Brianna observes; it probably won’t even bruise. And they know Laura hadn’t hit her head when she’d fallen or anything. Now, if this had happened back when they’d just had Robbie, when they were knew parents, Brianna probably would have been a little more concerned. But they’ve been through this many times before— Laura is their fourth child, after all— and over the last eight years, her and Johanna have learned to tell the difference between when one of the kids is really hurt, and when it’s just normal childhood dramatics and they’ll be okay once they cry it out.

Still, Brianna reaches out to stroke Laura’s hair back, humming softly as as Johanna wipes the tears away from her soft cheeks. By this time, the boys have noticed that something is wrong, running over to see what all the fuss is about. They watch their mums comforting their little sister, concern evident on their faces.

“Is she okay Mama?” Michael asks Brianna, his eyes big and worried.

“Oh, yes, she’s alright boys,” she tells them gently. “Don’t you worry, go on and keep playing.”

Michael and Jimmy are apparently satisfied with that response, and they quickly run back towards the trees to continue their game. Robbie, on the other hand, stays where he is, watching Johanna gently pat Laura’s back as she tells her that she’s okay. Being the oldest, Robbie has always been incredibly protective over his younger siblings, and he’s even more so when it comes to Laura, where he’s a whole five years older.

“Is she hurt Mama?” he asks Brianna softly.

“Oh,” Brianna waves her hand, “only a little.”

“What happened?”

“She just fell down after she jumped off her slide,” Brianna tells him absentmindedly, distracted by watching Johanna try to calm Laura down. Laura still crying into her chest, and Brianna thinks to herself that it’s probably about time for her to have a nap. She was up earlier than usual this morning, and Laura tends to be fussy and more emotional when she doesn’t get enough sleep. 

Suddenly Brianna hears a tiny sniffle from in front of her, and her head snaps back to Robbie, who’s looking at her tearfully.

“Robbie?” She asks, alarmed. “What’s the matter?”

Robbie’s lower lip quivers as he blinks back tears. “It’s my fault.”

Brianna’s confusion only grows. “What do you mean it’s your fault my love?”

Robbie is playing with his hands, and when he blinks, hot tears roll down his cheeks. “She must’ve saw me jump off the swing,” he says sadly, and after a moment it clicks in Brianna’s head.

“Oh, Robbie,” she says gently, opening her arms to let him crawl onto her lap the best he can with her belly in the way. “It isn’t your fault sweetheart.”

“B-But you said that if Laura or Michael or Jimmy saw me jump off the swing then they m-might copy me a-a-and get hurt.”

His little shoulders are shaking, and Brianna sighs quietly as she holds him and rubs his back. He’s getting a little big for being in her lap now, really— Robbie is almost nine and getting taller and ganglier by the day— but if Brianna is being honest, the day that her oldest child no longer fits in her lap for cuddles will probably be the day that she starts crying and never stops.

So she hushes Robbie as gently as she can, feeling his tears wetting her neck where his face is buried as she coos, “I know, lovie. I know. We don’t even know for sure that she was copying you, she might not’ve even seen you jumping off the swings.”

“She did,” Robbie cries, “I didn’t mean for her to get hurt.”

And god, as if one of her kids crying wasn’t enough for Brianna’s poor heart. Even when she isn’t pregnant, Brianna is a person who feels emotions— her own as well as others’— very deeply, and being pregnant, and the abundance of hormones that come with it, only serve to further intensify them. She feels tears prickling her own eyes, and she quickly blinks them back. The last thing Robbie needs right now is to see her crying too.

“Listen to me,” she tries, “it’s alright darling. I know you didn’t mean to. And Laura is going to be just fine, so everything is okay.”

“No she’s not,” Robbie shakes his head.

“Yes, she is,” Brianna says patiently. “Look, she’s not even crying anymore.”

That makes Robbie pause.

He peeks one eye open to look at Laura, and then quickly lifts his head out of Brianna’s neck. Brianna was right; Laura still looks rather sad and fragile, her bottom lip stuck out in a pout, her face all red and splotchy, but she’s stopped crying.

“Oh,” Robbie says in a small voice.

Brianna smiles gently as he sits up on her lap properly, trying to ignore the way his tailbone is digging into her thigh rather painfully. Johanna looks over at them, smiling softly.

“Robbie,” she says, “will you come kiss Laura’s booboos better please?”

Robbie rubs his tears away with his fists and nods, hopping down from Brianna’s lap to kneel down in front of his sister. He takes her left arm in his hands and stretches it out, pressing the gentlest of kisses to her elbow, and then does the same to her right one.

“Is that better?” Johanna asks Laura.

Laura smiles, nodding vigorously. 

“Wonderful!” Johanna tousles her hair, and then does the same to Robbie, who looks relieved.

Laura turns to Robbie then, her sore elbows apparently forgotten. “Wanna play slides?”

Johanna laughs softly as the two of them run off together to play. She stands up again, slinging an arm around Brianna’s shoulder. “You know,” she says, “We’ve gotten rather good at that.”

“I suppose we have,” Brianna chuckles. “Only took us eight years.”

Johanna hums, stepping closer to let Brianna lean over into her. Brianna smiles, leaning her head against Johanna’s hip and closing her eyes for a moment, resting her hand over the swell of her belly.

“Eight years…” Johanna echos after a moment. “God, where did the time go?”

Brianna smiles. “I dunno,” she says softly. “I wouldn’t trade it for anything, though.”

She feels more than hears Johanna’s laugh.

“God, you’re such a sap.”

“I’m pregnant, I’m allowed.”

“Yes, you are,” Johanna grins, ducking once to kiss the top of Brianna’s head, and then again to plant a kiss on her belly. Brianna hums, feeling the familiar flutter as the baby kicks.

“I think she liked that.”

“Yeah?” Johanna presses another kiss to Brianna’s tummy. And then another, and then another, until Brianna is giggling uncontrollably, and then Johanna finally pulls away, beaming, before she leans in once more for a proper kiss. Brianna smiles against her lips, so happy she feels like she could burst.

**Author's Note:**

> leave your thoughts and comments below, and come talk to me on my [tumblr](https://starrydrowse.tumblr.com/) :)


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